Forming adult friendships after college is difficult. If you struggle with this, you are definitely not alone.
Long gone are the days when you could pop your head into an open dorm room to see if someone on your floor wanted to grab a bite to eat, the days of cheering and high-fiving other students while standing in the student section of a basketball game, and the days where you had classes with dozens of other students with common interests.
Once you’ve graduated from college and started your career, it will take a lot more effort to find friends.
If the people you work with are all in different age groups with different interests, you might have trouble forming meaningful relationships with these coworkers. This means, unless you participate in other activities outside of work, you won’t have very many opportunities to make new friends.
However, if you are having trouble forming adult friendships, you are not alone. There are countless adults who find themselves struggling to find friends once their core friend group from college has moved away.
While finding a new friend group can be challenging, it is not impossible. Here are a few tips that will help you make new friends:
1. Try friendship apps
Relationship apps aren’t just for dating! There are dating apps, like Bumble, that have versions of their platform geared toward helping people find friends.
Here are some of the most popular friendship apps:
These apps help introverts and extroverts alike connect with others who share their interests and facilitate strong, real-life friendships.
Check out some friendship apps, make a profile, and start making connections with others today.
2. Take up a hobby
Taking up a new hobby is a great way to meet new people and make new friends.
Do you have an interest in music? Joining a beginners group guitar class can help you meet other people who are also interested in creating music and learning to play an instrument.
Are you a fan of board games or card games? See if there is a local board game community in your area. Many collectors’ shops and game stores host game nights for Magic: The Gathering and other tabletop or card games.
Have you always wanted to get in shape? There are tight knit running clubs and communities that you can join, and you can always meet people who are willing to help you perfect your form when you lift at the gym.
Think about activities or hobbies that interest you and look at your local classified ads, community social media pages, or flyers hanging around your area to see if you can join others that are also engaged in these activities.
If you can’t think of anything you’d like to do as a hobby, try volunteering for a local nonprofit. You might find that serving others in your community is a fun activity and a great way to meet other people who also like helping others.
3. Be intentional with your casual relationships
Chances are you already have some acquaintances and casual relationships that have the potential to become friendships.
Think about some of the acquaintances in your life:
- The colleague that you only talk to on the elevator ride to your floor at work
- The next-door neighbor that you wave politely to on your way to get your mail
- The fellow volunteer who helps you sort nonperishables at a food pantry or pass out announcement flyers at church
- The friendly dog owner whose dog always likes to play with yours at the nearby dog park
The next time you see them, try to see if you can take steps toward friendship by reaching out and asking about their day or their interests. By striking up a conversation that goes beyond pleasantries, you are opening the door to a potential friendship.
You could also see if they are interested in doing any casual activities with you. Maybe your colleague might want to get food on a lunch break. Maybe your neighbors would like to come over for a neighborhood barbecue.
While you might not be able to become close friends with all of the people you have casual relationships with right now, being more intentional with these individuals can potentially find a few new friends.