As parents, we watch our children grow into young adults in the hopes that they’ll succeed in finding themselves. Often, part of finding themselves involves leaving home to attend college. While we’re mostly excited for this new chapter in our lives (and our children’s lives), some part of us may feel a little hesitant. It’s normal.
After all, you’ve spent eighteen years raising your children and seeing them almost every day, so such a big change is bound to create mixed feelings. On one hand, you can hardly wait to see what the future holds as your child enters college, and on the other, you’re worried and you know how much you’re going to miss your child.
Let’s explore how to embrace the changes that occur as your child enters college.
The Transitional Period
When the college experience is fast approaching, it isn’t only your child who is going to experience a significant transition in life. As a parent, you’ll be facing a new sense of normal, one in which your child lives in a different city (or even a different state) where you won’t be able to see them every day.
Though this may seem saddening at first, try not to see it as a sad situation. You’re going to miss your child, but you’ll still be able to maintain contact in a number of ways. Your child might return home for holiday breaks, call or text you during evenings, or reach out via video conferencing tools. You’ll still see each other, and as you grow accustomed to the changes that are taking place, you’ll start to feel the excitement your child experiences at stepping into a brand-new chapter of his or her life.
Coping Strategies for Parents as Your Child Enters College
Here are a few easy coping strategies you can follow if your child is getting ready to leave for college.
Have a Communication Plan
Having a communication plan in place might help set your mind and your child’s mind at ease when the time comes for them to leave for college. Set some reasonable communication goals between yourself and your child so that they know they have a lifeline back home. However, it’s also important to understand that college life gets incredibly busy so if you don’t hear from your child during every communication opportunity, try not to worry.
Make Yourself Available
As a parent, you’re used to being there when your child needs help, and you still can be even if you’re not physically present. Let your child know that you’re available when they need to talk. Because college life can be very stressful, it’ll likely help quite a bit to have someone they know they can reach out to for help.
If your child is having a hard time, determine whether they need advice or just a listening ear and provide what you can, when you can.
Find an Outlet
Now that your college student is out doing their own thing, it’s time for you to do your own thing too. Find an outlet or hobby you can try so that you have something that’ll occupy your time while you’re getting used to the change in your life. Attend a class, take up painting, spend more time with friends, or work on developing a professional skill. Find whatever healthy outlet you need to help you cope during the first few months (or more).
Talk to Other Parents
Sometimes talking to someone who is experiencing the same sort of change as you can be helpful. If you can, reach out to other parents whose children have recently moved out. If you don’t know any other parents of college-aged children, try seeking a support group designed for parents in the same situation you’re in. This way, you can talk about how you’re feeling with others who understand how you feel as your child enters college.
Look for Positives
When you’re feeling low, try thinking about the positives of the situation. Your child is pursuing an education that’s going to pave the way for their future. They’re growing up and discovering who they want to be as people.
Furthermore, you’re embarking on a new chapter in your life, one where you can focus more on yourself and what you want to do. New opportunities exist for both of you.
Getting ready for your child to attend college can be a difficult situation to make peace with, but try to keep a positive outlook and be willing to guide them into the adventure they’re about to go on. College isn’t forever, and you’ll still have plenty of opportunities to talk and see one another.